As I've been reading a particular magazine lately it's become more a reality to me that I grew up in a church that wasn't so "christian" . Possibly this is why it's been such a challenge to get the lies of this church out of my mind, and to remove myself completely from it. Even now, as I write this, I hesitate to print the word, "cult". It's easier for me to say "spiritually oppressive", but the truth is, I grew up in a cult, and it took me years to get away.
Now, I rejoice in the truth! Now, I sometimes discover that I am believing something that isn't true, because of what I was told as a child, and I find that I am shocked! How can this be? I immerse myself in God's Word everyday and yet still I am sorting through the lies of the enemy.
I had a challenging conversation with a friend last night. The kind where I had to be honest about where I stand and how I feel. I left the conversation feeling exhausted, and I just went to bed. My heart was pulling in one direction, my mind in another.
This path that God has set before me is still forking. Trusted friends are holding up red flags and I see that, my heart longs to plunge forward, but I am also cautious. God, You are light, glory, warmth. You are everything I need. I know that You are the door and the path that I will take. You will bring all things together for Your good and for Your glory. You will bring my mind and my heart together, and You will bring unity. You are good all the time, and I will praise You.
Say that Again Jesus, You are the Way, the Truth, The Light. I will follow You.
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I'm walking this path too, who knows maybe one day I will catch up to you :-). Bethony, you shine bright in a dark world and I love you for having the courage to put yourself out there.
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