Thursday, June 2, 2011

The Paper



As God has directed me to move ahead with Women's Ministry, I have found that I am often confronted with a new fear of some sort. Most the time, I have been able to work through it pretty quick and move on, sometimes it seems to latch on for awhile.
I received a paper, four of them, with "guidelines" for a leader. Hmm, I see the red flag go up in my brain. Scanning down the sheet, I see the word, "requirements" And, I see a couple of red flags pop up.
We all need guidelines, right? When do the guidelines turn into rules? And, what if I can't keep all the guidelines, or I do things differently than someone else? Am I booted out? Do I even want in? Flag, flag, flag.
I've been praying for this, praying for a specific thing to take place, and God has answered my prayer. He did it fast and in an amazing way. And, now here I am faced with whether or not I really want to take Him up on the whole idea. Are these His requirements? Are they His "guidelines"? What does He call me to do when I am shepherding another? Is this even about what I can do? I don't think so. This is His strength through me, His light, His path, His talk.
I have to ask myself about my focus. I have to remind myself about His calling on my life. I have to remember all that He has said so far, and the wonders of His Ways. Why am I allowing myself to get hung up on a set of guidelines and requirements?
My answer to that is failure. I'm afraid I will fail. So, from there I have to take the step of moving beyond self and INTO His presence. He has to take this over, minister through me. Otherwise, I will start out as a failure in this. But, if I keep my focus solely on what He is asking of me, He will touch lives, using me as His witness. He has promised this.
Jesus, I give you The Paper. Jesus, I give you the human idea of what must be done to serve You effectively, and I give You my heart. Take it all, and use me.
Jesus, I'm going to Say That Again! Take it all, I'm Yours!

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