Friday, June 17, 2011

The Questions

Through out my life I have always had questions. Most of them were left unasked, now, some of them are coming out. When? What if? How? Who? Why?
As a child I use to often say "I just wanted to wonder!" And, wonder, I did. I wondered about all aspects of life, others, myself, the ants, the flowers, the sun, the alphabet, feelings, fears, hopes, pain, and death. I wondered if I would survive, and I wondered if I would be seen.  I wondered if I would be heard, and I wondered why...most all the time.
Why am I hurting? Why am I empty? Why do I feel lost? Why doesn't anyone hear me? Why am I even alive? Why do friends replace me? Why am I invisible? Why am I sad? Why doesn't God love me? Why is life so confusing?  And, on and on with the why's.
Now, I still get wrapped up in questions.  Sometimes I find myself asking the same old questions, and I have to answer them with God's truth. Why do I feel alone, right now? Why do I feel betrayed? Why do I want to be alone? Why do I feel sad? Why do I want to just quit?
What is God saying to me? Am I still going in the right direction? Does He care about this, or that? Does He have an answer for all these questions?
Am I shallow? Have I  been to shallow in the way that I lead? Am I really hearing the hearts of others, or am I just brushing them off?
Yes, there are millions of questions. Someday, in His Kingdom they will all be answered. Not now. Someday everyday will be a sure thing and I will be settled with many answers.
Say That Again, Jesus. Someday, the answers will pour in. 

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