Thursday, February 24, 2011

Windows

There's a lot of new snow outside.  This morning, I crawled back into bed, because I just needed to be cozy.  All the snow made me want to cuddle, have my fuzzy blanket, and see a fire.  When my husband got up I asked him to open the curtain so I could see outside, he pushed back the curtains beside our bed.  It is very pretty, but the view from that window is blocked  by a yellow house.  I can still see trees and snow, but not nearly as nice as the view from the other windows.  From our bathroom window, I see our hill and it is covered in white this morning.  Usually I see deer or squirrels wandering around, and it's serene.  From our other bedroom window I can see far out over the valley, the neighborhood, the street, the quiet in the early morning.  It too is very beautiful.  "Maybe we should move our bed over by that window," I suggested, then we can lay in bed and see the beauty outside. He nodded. "That house is in the way." I continued with a chuckle.
Windows, we all have them. What about the windows to my soul? What does someone see when they look into me? Is it a reflection of Jesus? Does my heart and soul have windows of beauty and love?
I read about obedience this morning, and how it is impossible to love God without obeying Him.  I remember a few years ago telling a friend that God had called me into obedience to Him.  Not just when I feel like it, but all the time.  My freedom depends on my ability to willingly obey Him.
The journey of obeying Him, and looking into my own windows has been challenging.  And, I haven't always done a spectacular job of it.  But, I can say, my heart is committed to this journey He calls me to.
I've had to allow Him to scrub many of my windows, so that I could reflect Him clearly, and so I could see clearly.  I've had to trust Him, lean on Him, challenge myself and others.  I've had to investigate things from my past and be real about them.  I've had to believe that even though some of the windows I have looked through in this process have been dirty, He is there, cleaning, living within me, refining me.  In some places, I just have needed brand new windows, because the old ones have been broken, smashed. He has done that for me, and as He continues to work in me, He gives me the ability to bless others.
Windows of my soul and heart reflect His love, His desires, His suffering, His relationship with me.  Ah, that is beauty to me, and I want to share it with others.
Jesus, Say That Again to me.  Open all my windows to you, and keep cleaning.  Walk with me through the journey of my window life.

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