Saturday, January 22, 2011

Ice Cream

My favorite food is ice cream. I especially like chocolate covered ice cream bars, with lots of nuts. Its good, and if I could, I'd eat one everyday. One of my favorite things to do is go to the snack bar at Costco, and order one of their ice cream bars dipped in chocolate and rolled in nuts.  This is sometimes a meal for me. It is good, but not healthy.  Well, its not totally bad, right? Chocolate has antioxidants, ice cream has protein (does it?) and of course the nuts are full of nutrition.  So, maybe I could increase my intake :-)  My friends had chocolate covered ice cream bars at my birthday party.  And, occasionally someone brings me one.  Now, if only they had them at the coffee bar at church....
When I was a kid, I enjoyed ice cream on the rare occasion.  I was usually with my grandma, and she fed me all kinds of treats, like ice cream, cold cereal, and coffee in my milk!  Now, as an adult, I still like all of these things, except I've switched to milk in my coffee!  But, these foods bring up good memories to me, and I like good, happy memories of my grandma.
What about the memories that aren't so good?  Yeah, I've had plenty of those too.  I tried to run from them for a long time, because I believed they would kill me, or make me completely unproductive.  What I didn't realize at the time was that I needed to voice them, allow my body to feel them, and then I would become mobile and free. I needed to experience all the stuff that was pent up inside of me, in order to enjoy the sweetness of life. I needed to let myself trust God and others so that I could recognize Who I really am.
Memories of the past can be a little like eating a chocolate ice cream bar.  They are cold.  They can freeze my brain into believing lies,  and cause me to stop, and not move ahead, because of fear.  They can be filled with nutty ideas, and certainly make me feel nutty.  They have a bittersweet flavor to them, just like chocolate.  Mostly, the experience itself was not good for me, but getting it out of my brain is optimal.  It is empowering and healthy, just like an antioxidant! Tacky, I know, but true for me today.
 The sweetness of it all, is knowing God.  Relationship with Him, life in His Spirit.  Excitement to be with Him and enjoy His presence.  To be filled with Him, rather than a negative memory, thought, or lies.  He heals.  He covers me with His wing and protects me. He loves me.
The thrills and joys of my God are countless, and the path He has taken me on is joyful, sorrowful, peaceful, unpredictable, and challenging. It has required me to trust, to step out of my comfort zone, to run off the cliff. Every time, He has been there to catch me. In His sweetness, and in His power.
Say That Again, Precious Jesus, that I can trust you and others and know that You will catch me every time!

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