The Slow Day

Today has been a slow day for me. I have felt slow. I have talked slow, walked slow, thought slow. Everything I've done has been slow, even my process of making the bed, was slow. I did a load of laundry; it was slow. I walked down to check on the kids, it was slow. The kids and their friends played here at our house for most of the day, it all felt slow. This is the first day in several that we didn't go anywhere, we just stayed home. The first day that I stayed still, and it felt kind of nice to be slow, steady, and quiet. The neighbors took all the kids swimming and I took a nap. Then, I woke up and read my Bible, it was peaceful and quiet. I stayed on my bed, the dogs at my feet and I found myself wishing that it could last much longer than possible.
So, I've decided to pray for more slow days, to be happy about the quiet pace of rest. I felt like I had to rest, but I'm going to look at it as a gift, because it really has been. Sometimes I just get going and I don't stop. My down time is sweeping the floor or throwing in a load of laundry or making food. Today, down time was a nap and reading, it was good.
Jesus, thank you for this reminder. Thank you for giving me slow so that I had to pace myself today. Thank you for giving me a glimpse of You and reminding me that You did not race around, but walked from here to there and stopped to talk and visit. Say That Again, Jesus, be slow and steady and remind me to rest IN your heart.

The Faith

Next week I am giving two speeches. One will be my testimony, the other will be a study on a bible verse. I am not prepared, yet. In fact, this is the first time I have approached the subject, except for a quick conversation with my husband. Why, I'm not sure. I just haven't known, yet, where to go with it all. I'm thinking that the Holy Spirit will give me what I need to have to get me through.
This morning as I was praying about some unnerving events in my life, and I see that these two speeches could certainly prove to be just that, God led me to Hebrews 11.  The Faith chapter. I love this chapter where I am reminded about all the Saints that lived by faith, and as I read it, God gently reminded me that I too can live by faith. Can I? Can I live as these Saints lived? Can I step out in faith and give my speech? Can I let the Spirit speak through me in such a way that others will see Him and not me? Can I walk in such a way that others will want to follow Him? Can I love others in such a way that they will know Him deeply and fully? Oh, I hope so!
As I visited with a friend today and saw some of the hurt she has experienced in her life because of rejection and pain, I prayed that I would learn to be more like Jesus. I prayed that I would learn to be kind, tender, and to have a heart like His. I want Him to use me to further His Kingdom. I want Him to fine tune me in such a way that I am willing to be His instrument and to be sensitive to His will. Give me the faith, Jesus, for all of this! Enable me to be the Saint, You desire me to be!
Jesus, Say that all again, I am Your Saint, and I can rely on Your faith, when mine is weak. You are there for me, and You will speak through me and live through me. Thank you Jesus!

The Lie

It's really been bothering me lately that I grew up believing The Lie. I was immersed in many lies, and it has taken many years to get out of them. The lies of the enemy, the lies of legalism, the lies of his bondage, the lies of death. I didn't know anything about grace, mercy, joy, His Spirit, identity IN Him, or freedom. I didn't understand what the New Covenant was, or what it meant to walk IN His Spirit and live  in His grace. Freedom. Wow, I missed out on so much!
Jesus brought me through a childhood of darkness so I could appreciate an adulthood of light! He has showed me what it is like to be on both sides, and believe me, bondage is not fun! Bondage is dark, it is all about living in secrets, lies, depression, hopelessness, despair, and pain. When I live in His light, He is able to take all of those things and give me hope. He is able to give me joy. He is able to lift me up out of my despair and give me relief! It is good. I am able to see that life is not all about me, there is a bigger picture. It is about God, and about reaching others for Him. It is about His Kingdom.
I believed that I had to work for my salvation.  I believed that I was bad, evil, constantly on the brink of loosing my salvation. I believed that my Heavenly Father was angry with me all the time and was just waiting for the opportunity to punish me. I believed that grace was non-existent. I believed that I was worthless in His sight. It was all a lie!
Now, I know, that I am complete IN Him. Now, I know that I am His Friend and that He loves me oh so much. Now I know that I am His beloved daughter and that I have all authority under heaven. Now, I know that I sit at His right hand in the heavenlies. Now, I know exactly who I am!
Say that Again, Jesus, my Lord and Savoir. You are God the great I Am, and I know who You are!

The Way

As I've been reading a particular magazine lately it's become more a reality to me that I grew up in a church that wasn't so "christian" . Possibly this is why it's been such a challenge to get the lies of this church out of my mind, and to remove myself completely from it. Even now, as I write this, I hesitate to print the word, "cult". It's easier for me to say "spiritually oppressive", but the truth is, I grew up in a cult, and it took me years to get away.
Now, I rejoice in the truth! Now, I sometimes discover that I am believing something that isn't true, because of what I was told as a child, and I find that I am shocked! How can this be? I immerse myself in God's Word everyday and yet still I am sorting through the lies of the enemy.
I had a challenging conversation with a friend last night. The kind where I had to be honest about where I stand and how I feel. I left the conversation feeling exhausted, and I just went to bed. My heart was pulling in one direction, my mind in another.
This path that God has set before me is still forking. Trusted friends are holding up red flags and I see  that, my heart longs to plunge forward, but I am also cautious. God, You are light, glory, warmth. You are everything I need. I know that You are the door and the path that I will take. You will bring all things together for Your good and for Your glory. You will bring my mind and my heart together, and You will bring unity. You are good all the time, and I will praise You.
Say that Again Jesus, You are the Way, the Truth, The Light. I will follow You.

The Race

We went for another walk today, on a trail that follows the lake. It was a beautiful day, and we had a great time. Our son and daughter rode on their scooters and weaved in and out of all the other walkers, bikers and runners! On the way back, we stopped at a dock so our son could swim. Then, to switch things up a bit, my husband took the scooter and raced; it didn't work out as well as children on scooters!
This is true for me in the race of life; it doesn't usually work out so well. The rat race, that is how it feels sometimes, when I'm trying to weave my way through the tasks, the people, the thoughts, the days...
I prefer to stay out of the rat race. To keep my feet on the highway that leads to heaven, and stay the course, steady and sure. It's the path that God is constantly reminding me of, the one He has laid out for me, steady and sure. This is the only race I want to be in, it's His race. I want to fit into the palm of His Hand, and allow Him to carry me, keep me, envelope all of me. When I get off track, I want Him to snatch me up and set things right. This is His promise to me, because I have promised to stay in His race alone.
Say That Again, precious Jesus, the race of life is only worth winning if You are the beginning, the middle and the end. It is You, and You alone that keeps me steady and sure in my race of life.

The Fun

I had dinner with friends tonight. I made hamburgers with the help of one girlfriend. I heard they were pretty good--I don't eat hamburgers.
We also had a yummy fruit salad and a rich chocolate cake and key lime pie. Very good, indeed.
I enjoyed the company of these ladies. And, I praise me Jesus for His healing power and for His love in relationship. He is good.
Jesus, you are my God and I love you.
This is the verse God put on my heart today:
... The sun of righteousness will dawn on those who honor my name, healing radiating from its wings. You will be bursting with energy, like colts frisky and frolicking. 3 And you'll tromp on the wicked. They'll be nothing but ashes under your feet on that Day." GOD-of-the-Angel-Armies says. Malachi 4
Say That Again, Jesus! You will heal, and I will be bursting with your energy!

The Blind

I once was blind, but now I see! I remember the day when I first started to see things more clearly, the day Jesus touched me. It was marvelous. He continues to touch me, in different areas of my life, and I continue to see things more clearly. It's a fascinating journey. When I look back on my journey, and see how blind I've been, and all that God has done, I feel grateful to Him and excited.
I read John 9 this morning, a great story about a blind man that Jesus touched and he could then see. The religious leaders during that time did not want to believe that the man was ever blind at all, and they certainly didn't want to believe that Jesus had healed him! How could a blind man clearly see? How could anyone possibly heal him?
The touch of Jesus, it is healing.  "Do you believe in the Son of Man?"  The Son of Man is the One that came into this world so that the blind would see! That's me, with His gentle touch, His healing hand, I can see!
Jesus is the great physician, my physician, and I know that He will continue to touch me, heal me, and take away blind spots.  Say That Again, Jesus! You will always heal, and create sight for me!