The Battle

My two little ones are at battle, sometimes.  They have those days when they just can't seem to get along. They are engaged in The Battle of self. Each of them wants his or her own way, and that is all that matters. Sometimes they believe lies about each other or themselves and, The Battle begins.
The Enemy will do whatever it takes to keep The Battle going. I know this, it happens to me. It's The Battle in my mind, the false beliefs that drift in and out and the work of captivating them and giving them over to God. The lies that speak defeat, depression, sadness,and insecurity. They project fear and rejection, pain, and loss. It's a battle to move beyond it all and engage in the Power of His Spirit.
One of my best coping skills is flight. If I feel threatened, I want to run. The enemy throws all kinds of trials my way in an effort to see me run. I'm sad to say, sometimes it works.  Sometimes, I run. Sometimes, I spend time thinking about running, battling over the right thing to do. Questioning, doubting, debating...
Today, I need Jesus. I am in The Battle. Jesus, Say That Again to me. You are ALL that matters. As I strive to focus only on You, I will surrender only to You. You will win The Battle, You have already won the war!

The Living Sacrifice

Sometimes, I have those days with God where I'm telling Him the way I think it should be done.  Or, I can feel such hurt and pain, that I'm continually stuck in the rut of being demanding, rather than submissive. Doesn't God know that my heart hurts? He still tells me to move forward anyway, to love, to pray, to give it all to Him. When I do just as He is asking, I can see His logic, sometimes,  and I can take a big sigh of relief . Or, it's just blind faith, and, I have to admit, that sometimes, His Path that He has laid out before me is scary for me. I want to take the lead. I want to control the situation. I want to inform Him of a better way!
As I was driving today and thinking about my day, my week, my stuff, I started to feel insecure and fearful. Two chapters came to mind, Romans 12 and Psalms 102. In Romans, the 1st verse it says this: "Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God's mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God--this is your spiritual act of worship." In the Message I read this: "So here's what I want you to do, God helping you: Take your everyday, ordinary life--your sleeping, eating, going to work, and walking-around life--and place it before God as an offering. Embracing what God does for you is the best thing you can do for Him."
So, it's back to that, the everything. He wants my fear, my insecurity, my entire life! I know I can't do this, so I find myself saying, "God, help me! Help me, help me!" Because on those days when I am telling Him what to do, when I am trying to control life, and I start to think it's all about me, I need Him to help me! I need Him to carry me to the alter, and hold me. I need Him to show me all that needs to be surrendered to Him, and I need Him to take it.
The very first verse in Psalms 103 is this "God, listen! Listen to my prayer, listen to the pain in my cries." He does listen, I know that.  He speaks to me, I know that too.  He challenges me, all the time, and for that I praise His name.
Jesus, take the fear that creeps up so unexpectedly! Take the insecurity. Say That Again to me, You hear my cry, Your Spirit takes my cries, my thoughts, and brings them to you in words I do not have. I am here to lay before You all of this, and today I will choose to let it go.

The Mantle

We have a fireplace in our bedroom, and I like it.  It use to be just plain white, but last year, I painted it blue, light blue. And, on the mantle, I have some of my favorite keepsakes: two red tiles with the hand prints of our two youngest children. Three red candles given to me by a close friend. A red vase, given to me by another good friend, and a small black clock, also given to me by a dear friend. Also, a pair of red silk shoes we purchased in China for our youngest child. Above the mantle is an old mirror, framed in a wooden frame with dark green velvet along the edge.  It's a mirror that my husband and I purchased years ago at an auction, a day with fond and happy memories. It's a small collection of some of the things I like, the keepsakes that bring the people I love to mind, the memories that I cherish.
As I looked at my collection this morning, God gently spoke to my heart. I am cherished by Him, He is keeping me in the special places of His heart, and He loves me. He fondly looks upon me and knows where I've been, and knows where I am going. His hand covering me every step of the way. Just as I covered the mantle in paint, He has covered me in His light and love.
We have a fireplace in our family room too.  I think I'll paint it a deep red. On that mantle we have displayed pictures of our sons and our daughters. There's a red sign in the middle of it all that a precious friend gave to me, it says "JOY".  God has brought us joy, and for this I am thankful. In every corner of my house, I am reminded of the love from others.
Is this true for the temple of my body? Do my words, actions, and thoughts portray the love of Jesus to others? When they see me, do they see Jesus?
Jesus, make me your home! Display yourself in my life, my heart, in every part of me. Shine through me today and everyday. I want to hear You Say That Again, Jesus, my heart is YOUR Home!

The Fourth of July

This is a good day, full and busy, yet relaxing. I spent time with Jesus this morning and He led me to 2 Thessalonians 2. In verse 13, it tells me that from the very beginning God chose me to be saved through the sanctifying work of the Spirit and through belief in truth. It encourages me to stand firm to the truth of Jesus who loves me.
As I was walking today, I thought about these verses and continued my conversation with Jesus from this morning. Here I am today, celebrating freedom, the freedom our country so enjoys. But, what if I lived somewhere that was not so free? Would I still be celebrating in my heart?  He has saved me! It doesn't matter where I am, I am free IN HIM! He has sent His Spirit to work on my spirit and to sanctify me daily, and as that happens, I believe the truth which is Jesus. I believe in freedom, because I'm walking in freedom, because He is freedom!
Today, on this fourth of July, I am celebrating my heart and the fact that Jesus lives there. I am rejoicing that He chose me, and my little life to work through me to display the freedom that He offers. Yes! The freedom from bondage, the miracles, the life, the truth---today is freedom big time!
This is my God, my King, and I will worship Him today.
Jesus, continue to Say That Again to me, I am free, because You chose me!

The Window

The window in my car has been out of order for several weeks now.  In the front, on the passengers side. It's stuck down, a little bit. Because this window has taken up it's old habits again, the habit of being broken, I cannot go through a car wash, because the window is down. So, consequently, I have a car that is somewhat dirty, more so than usual.
I get frustrated with this window on occasion. My Land Rover is quirky.  It has all these little habits, and I can't seem to make it change.  My husband fixes them, and it behaves well for awhile, and then, ta-da, the same old problems creep up again.
I bet you've guess by now where I'm going with this thought! Yup, old habits that creep back up after trying so hard to change.  Just like Paul talks about in Romans 7, why do I do the stuff I don't want to do?  Why can't I just make myself be well behaved all the time?  What is the problem, anyway?
I can be moving along in life at a happy pace, and then right out of the blue, an old habit creeps up on me, and before I even see it, I'm doing it again! Oh, I don't like it when that happens!
Then, I run to God and surrender it all over again.  I ask Him to just take it and forgive me for trying to do life all on my own, again. I look at the habit in a different way, and realize that I am human, I will fail.
Today, I am keeping my focus right where God told me to, on Him.  I am giving my all to Him, today and trusting He will keep me on the path that He has laid out before me.  He is good, He is grace. I love Him.
Say That Again, Jesus, you  are so good, so full of grace, you are worthy in every way!

The Shoes

We went to the store today to buy shoes for our son and daughter. Our son picked out some cool red high tops, our daughter picked out silver and pink runners. They put them on right away, and much to their amazement they could run faster and jump higher. All because of a new pair of shoes, they believed they could do everything better.
I spent a little time thinking about this and how true this is for me. If I believe I am who God says I am, everything is approached differently, than if I believe the Enemy. If I believe in my heart all that is true, my actions will reflect that truth.
I am alive In Him. I am His daughter. I am His Saint. I am cleansed by His blood. I am washed and white as snow. I am Free IN HIM. I am loved, His beloved. I am sitting at His right hand, transferred from the kingdom of darkness INTO the kingdom of light. I am daily throwing myself at His Feet, surrendering all that I am, for all that He is.
Jesus, Say That Again. You are IN my heart and I will believe. You are an everlasting God, My God! You have asked me to focus on You and believe IN You alone.

Until next time....

The Land

The kids and I went for another alley walk today. We went to the playground and they played there for a couple of hours. It was sunny and beautiful outside. The grass is green, the lake is inviting, but cold. There was a breeze. A lot of people were out and about excited for the long weekend.
I am excited to be able to be outside. I'm excited to use the land that He has given us. It feels so good. It is a lovely gift.
As I prayed this morning for direction, God made a few things very clear. He told me that He is the Path, and as long as I am able to just keep my eyes and focus on HIM, I will know the direction to go.  He led me to Joshua 2, the story of Rahab and the Israelite spies. I read through the entire story and at the end it says this; " The Lord has surely given the whole land into our hands, all the people are melting in fear because of us."
Ah, in my heart it felt like God was saying to me, "Bethany, I am giving you and others the whole land, this is your mission field, now go and be fruitful for me."
Am I courageous and bold enough to go out and take this land that He has given me?  Do I follow Him, my Path and Light, so that others will know Him too? Have I been able to recognize that the fork in the road is an avenue to a large harvest? Do I see where I am now as a stepping stone into more of His will?
There are many people in the land that I live that are like Rahab.  They are ripe and ready to fear the Lord. They just need someone to invite them. Jesus is enticing me to invite, and I will step forward in His invitation.
Say That Again, Jesus, You have given the whole land into our hands, my hands, the hands of Your Body. Praise to You this day!