Thursday, February 13, 2014

The Fall

Today was a nice day for me, and a difficult day. The nice part was a quiet morning at home, before going to be with a friend. After picking up my friend, we spent about three hours together, and it was a relaxing time. We went to a coffee shop for tea and scones, then had a delightful walk in the park. Today was a warm day with the sun shining on our faces. All the snow is melting and there are big puddles of water everywhere. As we went to cross a busy road, one car cruised through a huge puddle and I almost got another shower! It would not have been my best moment.
As I was getting ready to leave this morning, my brother informed me that my mother had taken a fall, and she was being moved to the hospital. After testing, it was discovered that she had a bleed in her brain, and a broken neck. Fortunately, everything stayed in place and she is still able to move. The healing process will be long for her though, and painful.
When I think of loosing someone, it is hard for me. I know what that feels like, and it's not good. I am not sure if there is anything that can be done to prepare for such a loss. There is a part of me that wants to go to my mother even though I know there is really not anything I can do. Then, there is another part of me that wants to avoid the pain I would feel and stay home.
If someone were to ask me what that pain is, I don't know that I could tell them. It doesn't have a name, at least not today.
Wasn't it just this morning that I wrote about a good season? It still is, but now it is laced with a fall. Now I am wondering if there is something more I could be doing. Now, I am asking God to shine light on my choices and shine light on my heart so I will know which way to move.
Sometimes staying still, right in the same place is the best thing to do.  Sometimes racing to the bedside of a loved one is the better thing to do. I do not know today.  But, I do know that God is good, and He has blessed me with a peace that He is in control. I will rest in that.
Even when there is a fall, it can be good. Even when I don't know what to do, it can be good, because I know God is good. In this prayerful moment I will Say That Again, Jesus shine light on the path ahead, for I know it will be good.

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