Friday, December 20, 2013

The Business Trip

My husband just returned from a business trip, he's been away for 2 1/2 weeks. It seemed much longer than that to me. The first few days he was gone, my children were sick, and I was not exactly pleased with the way life was feeling. I was tired, and my body hurt, and it felt like I would never feel good. I remember a friend sending encouraging words to me that week reminding me that recovering from surgery takes time and then she said that she was "praying Jesus over me." It was a simple reminder to me that to have Jesus prayed over me was enough for that day. I didn't have to rush; it was okay to go slow and let my body heal.
To speak those words to me felt healing; it felt like love.  This is how I want to speak, words that heal.
My kids and I spent a lot of time on my bed. Fur Ball too. At least this is what we did the first five days my husband was gone. I tried to move myself back into the routine of life, but clearly, it was not time.
The last week went much better, it felt like we turned a corner. A friend had come to stay with us and I think that was just the boost we needed. She drove my children all about. She cooked, and she cleaned. She sat me down when I tried to get up to do to much. She was a genuine lifesaver. She was love in action. She brought healing to my heart in many ways, as so many friends have during this time in my life. She showed me the beauty of giving up ones own life for the good of another, self-sacrifice. Because she chose to love me, she gave up her own agenda and came into my life to help me. This is walking Jesus, and this is how I want to walk.
I was invited to a Christmas Tea. The setting was lovely. I only knew a couple people at my table, but as I talked to each of the ladies and learned about their lives, one theme stood out. Relationships! They all talked about the relationships in their lives, their children, their friends, or their lack of. Through out the conversation, I could hear my God gently reminding me as He so often does, "I am always with you, I will never leave you or forsake you!"  And, I felt great comfort as I always do when I hear Him tell me this. But, as I sat at the tea that day and listened, I did wonder if everyone there believed that too.
I went to a friends house to make goodies and watched her son do funny tricks. He showed me all his Lego and told me Star War stories. I smiled that day at the beauty of a child, the wonders of his imagination. I thought about the time that Jesus said we must have faith like a child, and it seemed so simple that day.
God brings so much into my life, and allows me to witness so many joys, and so many sorrows. Just this week, I cried out to Him in anger as I witnessed the worst of pain. And, through that I told Him that I did not know how I could possibly love some people! But, He was quick to respond in His gentle way, by just a simple answer. "Even this person needs you to love through me!"  Through my anger and my tears, I was caught off guard by the clarity of His voice. Once again, it is true, I cannot love, only HE can love through me.
And, now it is husband is home, my kids are excited that Christmas is so very close. I am excited that this year all my children and grandchildren will be home for Christmas. I am feeling a little better every day, my body actually moves at a normal pace, without a cringe on my face. I've had some uplifting words of encouragement about Agape Celebration and God's thoughts. He is working and weaving His way through my Sister Saints, and His love is growing through us and moving through out the community. I am praising Him for this, and thanking Him for each and every day in which I can grow and learn.
Jesus, I will Say That Again, thank you for each and every day, that I grow and learn!

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